Relationships with our significant others can be a source of joy, pain, growth, and frustration…and all with the same person. As humans we are born with a need and longing for connection; we want to be understood, cared for, heard, loved, and appreciated. Alas, we can end up feeling abandoned, disconnected, rejected, and inadequate in what was and is supposed to be one of the most important relationships we have in our lives- a romantic relationship. We often ask our partner to meet our emotional needs but they don’t know how. Anger, criticism, and demands are cries to our partners hearts, asking them to connect emotionally with us.
Underneath the fights and distress are essential questions:
- “Can I depend on you to have my back?”
- “Do I matter to you?”
- “Do you value and accept me?”
- “Do you need me & rely upon me?”
Couples counseling can seem intimidating and it requires you to be vulnerable but it can be very beneficial for your relationship and for you as individuals. Couples therapy helps create and strengthen your emotional bonds by creating and transforming key moments in your relationship and everyday interactions by asking you to: be open, be attuned and be responsive to each other.
Families look different now than they did in the 1950s. Nearly 4 in 10 marriages include one partner that has been married before. Perhaps you have what is called a “blended family” and you and your partner are struggling to define boundaries with ex-partners, children etc, and maintain your romantic relationship. There may be days, nights, and fights in which you wonder if it is all worth it. Couples counseling can help the two of you define your journey as a couple and new family unit, away from the chaos that others are creating.
Couples therapy can also help you decide if your relationship is the right relationship for you. Attending couples therapy is likened to ripping off a scab and causing your injury to bleed again. Making the decision to end your relationship within couples therapy allow the opportunity for you to transition your relationship to a new phase with a new understanding and a gained empathy for your partner.
My process is to meet initially with you as a couple (appointment #1), then you as individuals (appointments #2 and #3), and then reconvene as a couple to make a treatment plan with you as a couple (appointment #4). A couples therapy plan will be individually designed on your needs, strengths, and challenges, and areas for growth. I utilize Emotionally Focused Couples Therapy (EFT), the Gottman Institute techniques for couples therapy, Relational Life Therapy, and other techniques. Emotionally Focused therapy has a success rate of approximately 70-75% and 90% of couples who actively participate report improvement in their relationship satisfaction.
Couples $140/session, 80-90 minutes, $165/intake session, 90 minutes
Individual Counseling $85, 60 minutes
Please visit the FAQ’s page.
Please send me an email or call me today for a free 20 to 30 minute consultation. I look forward to hearing from you.